Unconditional

 

 

Come just as you are to me.

Don't need apologies, 

Know that you are (un)worthy.
I'll take your bad days with your good.

Walk through the storm, I would.

I do it all because I love you.

Unconditional, unconditionally.
I will love you, unconditionally.
There is no fear now,
Let go and just be free
I will love you, unconditionally.

 

I'm guilty. I totally just quoted Katy Perry in my blog. And not only that, but I bought her whole CD. Shame on me, I know. But holy cow...these lyrics. If you know anything about Katy Perry, you know that she was not only raised Christian, but her father is a well-known pastor. Deep down I believe that she is still madly in love with Jesus, and I pray that she will find her heart in His again someday. 

But that's not what this post is about...

Really, I've been listening to this song non-stop for the past week and am overwhelmed by the thought of unconditional love. You see, while these lyrics are most certainly beautifully written to reflect what should be earthly love, if you listen to them thinking of heavenly love...wow. Re-read the verse I posted above and think about Jesus singing these words to you. Beautiful. Breathtaking. Intimate. Real. Deep. Tangible. SO GOOD. Now, read it again and imagine you singing that to Him. Wow. Yes...yes!


un·con·di·tion·al

adjective

1. 

not subject to any conditions.

 

Not subject to ANY conditions. No matter what you do, what you say, how you mess up, where you fail...no matter what, His love for us will not change. There is no other love like that. You can search and search all you want down here, but until you fall madly in love with our Creator...you will leave feeling empty and unfulfilled. You will be disappointed if your heart isn't focused on Jesus. But once you do fall madly in love with Him...get ready! Because your world will be rocked. He will reveal His greatest plans for you. He will show and give you love like you never knew was possible. He will give you joy and open your heart in a new way. He will re-shape your greatest desires. He will provide for you, bigger than you could dream. He will love you, unconditionally.

 

So, yes...I quoted Katy Perry in my blog. Oh well :) But I think it was worth it. 

 

Learn to love Jesus because He loves you. It's not subject to any conditions. And when you do...you'll stand in awe of what He does to your life. I promise.

Love. Love. Love.

K

al·ways

adverb

1. 

at all times; on all occasions.

Someday...

If you know anything about me, you probably know how excited I am to be in heaven. ...HOLD UP! Has this girl officially lost it???... Calm down. I'm not saying that I want to be in heaven right now. You don't need to add me to a watch list. I'm ok. What I am saying is that, despite all of things I want to experience/accomplish (babies!!! I mean...what? ;)) here on earth, I literally cannot wait to be in heaven with my Savior.

Can you imagine? Can you dream that big? Can you contain that amount of excitement? Life everlasting with our Creator. God. Dad. A place with no more fears, doubts, insecurities, death, destruction, pain. A place where we can dance and sing and drive and bake and laugh and be filled with constant, unrestrained love. Love abundantly. Love overflowing. Love that doesn't forget. Love. Real love. Love.

I cannot wait.

With that...here is a song I happened upon yesterday. Since then I have listened to it nearly 50 times. No jokes. This song gives you a tiny glimpse at my heaven excitement. I guess other people are just as thrilled as I am. Phil Wickham, thanks for being excited about heaven.

Heaven Song:

 

You wrote a letter and You signed your name
I read every word of it page by page
You said that You'd be coming, coming for me soon
Oh my God I'll be ready for You

I hear Your voice and I catch my breath
'Well done my child, enter in and rest'
Tears of joy roll down my cheek
It's beautiful beyond my wildest dreams

I want to run on greener pastures
I want to dance on higher hills
I want to drink from sweeter waters
In the misty morning chill
And my soul is getting restless
For the place where I belong
I can't wait to join the angels and sing
No, I cant wait to join the angels and sing my heaven song

 

Love. Love. Love.

K

Pick Up Your Cross

How do you want to be remembered when you leave this world? I want to be remembered for how I loved. I suck. I'm really bad at a lot of things. Thank God for His grace and forgiveness and blessings He's given me, because without Him, I'd be a whole lot of useless. But through Him, I want to bless people with love. Compassionately loving those around me. Deeply loving people who've wronged me. Honestly loving the ones that have hurt me. Love. That's how I want to be remembered.

So how do you do that? How do you just pick up your cross everyday, heavy with the insecurities that have been thrown at you from years of destructive hate, heavy with the weight of this sinful world, heavy with every burden of every person you encounter in this crazy mixed up life...how do you just pick that up and walk? And not just walk, but persevere through every bit of adversity and live righteously. How do you do that? How do you figure out what to lay down and what to leave behind? Or what to hold on to and what to never, ever let go of? How do you figure that out?

I think you just have to keep going. 

You're weaving your way through these blaring orange traffic cones in life that may have been misplaced and led you to a dead end, may have completely taken you down an insane detour that lasted way longer than expected, or may have taken you on the most beautiful back country road with spectacular views. But you're going and you're moving and everyday you're making the decision to pick up your cross and keep going.

I'm not going to do everything right. I'm going to fail. I'm going to fail the people I love the most. But I'm going to keep going, and I'm going to love harder than I ever have before. Because it's worth it. And some people aren't going to understand it, but the few that do are going to be worth it too.

Dad, I need Your help. I need to know what to put down and what to hold on to and never let go of. But most importantly, I want to love like You made me to. Thank you for loving me in spite of my failures. I can't do it alone. Continue to lead me down this crazy road; I know the destination is worth it.

Love. Love. Love.
K

New Season

We've had little sneak peeks of Fall around Maryland lately. There have been a couple days where the weather cuts through the nasty humid summer air (can you tell how much I don't like the summer...) and reveals the most perfect temperature to do anything in. Fall. It's my most favorite season of the year. The smells, tastes, feelings... What's better than wearing a sweatshirt and flip flops, curled up under a blanket by the bonfire, roasting marshmallows and enjoying pumpkin desserts? Not many things can compare, I'd argue.

And we're almost there. We're almost at the moment when the leaves will start changing to their magnificent colors, and you can hardly stand to stop looking as you drive through the mountains. We're almost ready for the brisk evenings where you wish you could drag your bed outside and gaze at the autumn stars for eternity. I can't contain it! I'm really looking forward to this Fall. For many reasons...

I'm ready for a new beginning. I'm ready for a refreshing of sorts. I'm ready to jump right into a new season with my Savior and break down more of these ridiculous built-up walls in my world. I'm ready. I don't have any expectations for this Fall. No, I'm just hopeful. I know God is going to provide and rock my world. If my entire life hasn't been a testament to His saving grace, these past 6 months have been. Now that I'm on course for a new pursuit, let the colors change and let the leaves fall! It's a new season. Get ready.

Dad, You never stop saving us. You never stop pursuing us. I want to be the woman You need me to be. Not just for my friends, family and future...no, I want to be the woman that You need. I'm not giving up down here. These crazy life moments that I find myself in the midst of are drawing me closer to You. I realize, at the bottom, that I don't want to do it alone, even if I could. Thank You for saving me. Let this Fall be transformational, like never before. Breathe new life into these bones and let me do Your work here. I'm ready. I love You.

And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. (Galatians 6:9)

Love. Love. Love.
K

You're good and Your love is great

I need You to open my eyes,
To see that You're shaping my life.
I need You to pierce through the dark,
And cleanse every part of me.

All I am, I surrender.

Give me faith to trust what You say.
That You're good, and Your love is great.
I'm broken inside, I give You my life.

I may be weak, but Your Spirit's strong in me.
My flesh may fail, but my God You never will.

These lyrics have been playing over and over in my head for the past few days. Like nothing else is there but these words, pleading with God to give me faith.

I feel like the wind has been knocked out of me again. Like I was running the race, trying to persevere through adversity, and I got tripped up again. This year...my God, You must really need me to pay attention to You. I'm there...I'm paying attention.

 

Do you ever feel like you're missing it? Or maybe like you've missed it all along? But at the same time you can look at parts of your life and know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that this all wouldn't be happening without God's perfect plan. I'm there. That's where I am right now. I have moments when I don't think I will make it, and then I have brilliant revelations that I am in the palm of His hand. Why are these two individually complex emotional states battling in my mind and spirit? Because of sin...I know. We live in a sinful world that is broken, and we're fighting a daily battle to live a life of love for God. 

But I'm broken and weak and struck down. I just need You to remind me that I'm not abandoned or destroyed. I'm going to fail You, and I know You never will fail me. I know You're shaping my heart to be everything You need me to be. You're so good and Your love is so great. I need You. I need every part of You. 

I used to have this verse on my computer at work and I would read it every day. This morning I was reminded of it again...

Romans 8:24-25

"We were given this hope when we were saved. 

If we already have something, we don't need to hope for it. 

But if we look forward to something we don't yet have, 

we must wait patiently and confidently."

Dad, thank You for loving me and saving me and keeping me. I don't have the words to say, but You know. And I trust You.

Love. Love. Love.

K

It's Alright, Everything Will Be Ok

No promise of an easy road
Just a destination
Next time you forget your hope
Somebody's waiting
Soon as you open your eyes, you'll realize

It's alright, everything will be okay
You just hold tight, I'll be with you the whole way
When you're weak, I'll be strong
Keep going, we're almost home
It's alright, everything will be okay

Do you ever have moments that completely steal your hope? I don't mean to be depressing, that's definitely not my intention. But, let's be real... there are some situations, people, encounters that completely steal your hope. In that moment, you feel like Jesus isn't there and that He'll never be there again. ...and then He pulls through and you realize that you've closed your eyes to your beloved.

I heard this song by Brandon Heath this morning at the most appropriate time. Eclipsed once again by a life-long emotional struggle, I momentarily lost hope. Every ounce of insecurity, anxiety, fear, and sadness came flooding back...I closed my eyes. And then, after being reminded that I need to have grace, this song came on and hurled me into the actual reality I needed to claim. He's here. He's strong. He's with me the whole way. I have hope because He is hope. It's alright...everything will be ok. 

Can you imagine being the fisherman on the tiny boat being thrown around by a horrific storm while Jesus is fast asleep? But He was there, wasn't He? He didn't leave them and right when He opened His eyes, the storm was gone. Or how about Mary watching her Son be ripped apart? But He comforted her and reminded her where He was going, why He needed to suffer. Those are both moments when He was on Earth (Oh, how I wish I could have lived and experienced Jesus), but the reality is that His spirit is just as strong, just as comforting, just as real as it was when He walked the Earth.

Sometimes you feel like you're in the middle of chaos, even if it is just a brief moment of doubt, and it's like you'll never know the other side. But remember, He's with you the whole way. There's no promise of an easy road...just a destination.

Thank you, Jesus for loving me wholly and completely.

Love. Love. Love.

K

Nothing is Wasted

You know my every need
You see my poverty
You are enough for me, Jesus
You gave the blind their sight
You raised the dead to life
You've done the same for me, Jesus

Your word inside of me
My strength, my everything
My hope will always be Jesus
Your breath inside my lungs
You're worthy of my trust
You will forever be Jesus

You are loving, You are wise
There is nothing in my life You cannot revive
You are loving, You are wise
There is nothing too hard for our God

Nothing is wasted
You work all things for good
Nothing is wasted
Your promise remains
Forever You reign

This song has been my heart cry for the past several months. It's packed with a lot of raw emotions for me. Can you even begin to fathom how there is nothing in your life that is too hard for God? Every bit of your world is being worked together for good. He isn't wasting anything. He is loving. He is wise. The same power that raised Jesus from the grave is still moving, still changing, still reviving, still breathing in our lives today.

This song speaks everything that I can't.

You're worthy of my trust. Forever.

Love. Love. Love.

K